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alwaysinmy heartAm I crazy to hurt so much? They  have told you  feeling grief for the loss of a pet is silly, crazy and just plain overly sentimental.
Then some friends have told you that your intense grief over the loss of a pet is normal and natural.

 Who is right? You feel devastated by the loss of your best friend. So many years he was your constant companion. You were very surprised by your friends and even some family members that just do not understand you pain...

 Rusty was a source of comfort and companionship, of unconditional love and acceptance, of fun and joy. The thought of him brings tears welling up in your eyes. 

People who don't understand the pet/owner bond may not understand your pain. All that matters, however, is how you feel. Don't let others dictate your feelings: They are valid, and may be extremely painful. But remember, you are not alone: Thousands of pet owners have gone through the same feelings.¹
Different people experience grief in different ways. Besides your sorrow and loss, you may also faithful ftiendexperience the following emotions: Guilt may occur if you feel responsible for your pet's death-the "if only I had been more careful" syndrome.

 It is not your fault. You did the best you could.

It is pointless and often erroneous to burden yourself with guilt for the accident or illness that claimed your pet's life, and only makes it more difficult to resolve your grief.  Denial makes it difficult to accept that your pet is really gone.

 It's hard to imagine that your pet won't greet you when you come home, or that it doesn't need its evening meal. Some pet owners carry this to extremes, and fear their pet is still alive and suffering somewhere. Others find it hard to get a new pet for fear of being "disloyal" to the old. leftlife notmyheart

 Feelings of Anger

 Anger may be directed at the illness that killed your pet, the driver of the speeding car, the veterinarian who "failed" to save its life. Sometimes it is justified, but when carried to extremes, it distracts you from the important task of resolving your grief. 

 Depression is a natural consequence of grief, but can leave you powerless to cope with your feelings. Extreme depression robs you of motivation and energy, causing you to dwell upon your sorrow.¹

Dealing with the loss of a pet when others devalue your loss.

One aspect that can make grieving for the loss of a pet so difficult is that pet loss is not appreciated by everyone. Friends and family may ask “What’s the big deal? It’s just a pet!”

 Some people assume that pet loss shouldn’t hurt as much as human loss, or that it is somehow rainbowpoem zinappropriate to grieve for an animal. They may not understand because they don’t have a pet of their own, or because they are unable to appreciate the companionship and love that a pet can provide.²


Seek out others who have lost pets.

Don’t argue with others about whether your grief is appropriate or not. Accept the fact that the best support for your grief may come from outside your usual circle of friends and family members.  Seek out others who have lost pets; those who can appreciate the magnitude of your loss, and may be able to suggest ways of getting through the grieving process.²

 What can I do about my feelings?

The most important step you can take is to be honest about your feelings. Don't deny your pain, or your feelings of anger and guilt. Only by examining and coming to terms with your feelings can you begin to work through them. You have a right to feel pain and grief! Someone you loved has died, and you feel alone and bereaved.

You have a right to feel anger and guilt, as well. Acknowledge your feelings first, then ask yourself whether the circumstances actually justify them. Locking away grief doesn't make it go away. Express it. Cry, scream, pound the floor, talk it out. Do what helps you the most.


Don't try to avoid grief by not thinking about your pet; instead, reminisce about the good times. This will help you understand what your pet's loss actually means to you. Some find it helpful to express their feelings and memories in poems, stories, or letters to the pet.

 Other strategies including rearranging your schedule to fill in the times you would have spent with your pet; preparing a memorial such as a photo collage; and talking to others about your loss.

Who can I talk to? If your family or friends love pets, they'll understand what you're going through. Don't hide your feelings in a misguided effort to appear strong and calm! Working through your feelings with another person is one of the best ways to put them in perspective and find ways to handle them. Find someone you can talk to about how much the pet meant to you and how much you miss it-someone you feel comfortable crying and grieving with. pet-memorial-gifts-j7z8wC